Worldwide Dave

Felix's 15 Seconds

2010-02-18T20:21:00.000-05:00

Felix, our Malaysian street cat, can open the doors in our house. Now before you gush over how clever he is, you should know his motivation for opening the door is to eat the flowers inside that will make him throw up.

Halifax Hamster Tubes

2010-02-17T20:11:00.003-05:00

Better late than never. From my trip to Halifax in November 2009. They have these hamster tubes throughout the city they call Pedways to protect the pedestrians from the elements as they amble across town.

Evolution of a Deathcicle

2009-12-17T19:18:00.002-05:00

This beauty is growing off our roof. Look out below.

Felix Navidad!

2009-12-14T07:01:00.002-05:00

Japadog

2009-11-26T19:10:00.000-05:00

While in Vancouver, I got to partake of the world-famous Japadog. I have now eaten at the same hot dog stand as the likes of Ice Cube, Stephen Seagal,and Anthony Bourdain.

Overdue Post - Crazy Westerners

2009-11-23T19:02:00.005-05:00

I know I'm long overdue for an update. I've got a couple lined up. Stay tuned. First, just to show that crazy signs are not limited to the Far East.

Skateboarding and Biking are not allowed, but you are invited to collect dog turds.

Blast From the Past

2009-09-23T20:46:00.000-04:00

While in DC this summer, The fam got together with my old Granville roommate, RJ and his wife, Zerlinde. It's like Facebook, only in real life.

Last Post on KL

2009-09-22T20:33:00.001-04:00

Going through the photos, I came upon the last set I wanted to post about KL. For father's day, I wanted to do the canopy walk at the FRIM (Forestry Research Institute of Malaysia). I made everyone else go to. Luke had some highly amusing comments from the day.

1. As we walked up the hill, through the jungle to actual canopy walk, it was hot and wet. Luke slipped at one point (he was wearing crocs because he couldn't find his tennis shoes) This prompted him to say, "And that's why I hate the rainforest!"

2. After finally making it to the walk, waiting in line, walking the walk, and coming down, we had a 30 minute walk out of the jungle. Luke then said, "I'm never coming to the jungle for Father's Day again."

Forbidden

2009-09-14T14:08:00.000-04:00

There are a lot of "No" signs. Here are a couple of good ones.

No shorts in the mosque at the Forestry Research Institute of Malaysia (FRIM). And no smoochy in the taxi.

Executor Revisted

2009-09-13T14:05:00.002-04:00

We have left Malaysia now, but I still have a few more photos to share. They really don't like trespassers in KL. The owner is using a rifle now, so he can still shoot the offender from farther away as he tries to run.

As Good As It Gets 2 - Just Like the Jing

2009-06-18T08:47:00.000-04:00

Last week the burning (of something) at the Palm Oil plantations in Indonesia (the usual scapegoats) caused Beijing like "haze" in KL. That's gotta be one big-ass bonfire to smoke out the whole city. No blue skies for several days.

As Good As It Gets

2009-06-17T08:42:00.000-04:00

To my friends here, I'm a bit of a Chinese food snob. Malaysian Chinese food is just not the same as what I could get in Beijing. I've finally found a place almost as good as what I'm used to. The Crystal Jade on Jln Sultan Ismail was okay, but Dragon-i in the food court is the taste-test winner. While it is more expensive than what I would pay in the Jing, the taste is just as good (mostly). Some photos illustrate my love of cubed chicken dishes.

GongBao JiDing

Lazi JiDing

Panda Clairebear

2009-06-16T03:43:00.000-04:00

Claire dresses up in the Panda suit. It will be a sad day when Claire outgrows this one.

Tennessee Dave and the Sidewalks of Doom

2009-06-15T08:50:00.003-04:00

Another not-so-endearing characteristic of KL we will NOT miss are the sidewalks of doom. First off, the curbs are a foot off the ground to try to dissuade the scooters from riding on them. It is not always successful, but it is always inaccessible to wheelchairs and strollers. Then there are the endless open (or poorly covered) drainage pits. Sometimes pavement over drainage pipes also collapse.

Extra Feature Below - That's a 5-6 foot drop-off to the left and those metal screws jut out of the ground every couple of feet.

Video Clip of Me Walking Down Sidewalk to Work

Step Up 2 The Streets KL Style

2009-06-15T03:35:00.003-04:00

So Friday and Saturday nights, the corner of Jalan Sultan Ismail and Jalan Bukit Bintang turn into impromptu danceoffs. Sometimes they have boom-boxes and sometimes they just do this:

KL Hotel for Dogs

2009-06-14T02:44:00.003-04:00

There used to be a lot of wild dogs in the vacant lot behind our apartment. Now that the vacant lot has been turned into a major construction site, we've wondered what happened to all the dogs. We've found them. They've moved to another abandoned house nearby.

Luke Loses Another Tooth

2009-06-13T20:58:00.002-04:00

They're starting to drop like flies. At least we were able to keep this one. Hopefully he'll start losing from the top soon.

Would You Buy Milk From This Man?

2009-06-13T09:24:00.002-04:00

Goat's milk, actually. From an urn on the back of his scooter.

Claire Turns 4, Luke Has a Party.

2009-06-11T02:13:00.004-04:00

Oh, the inequity. Claire actually has a birthday, but only a family party. She didn't go to any of the sub-standard preschools here, so she hasn't met any kids her age during our time here. Luke turns 6 this summer, but we will be between countries. So we had his party before school let out.

PSA Post: Wondermilk

2009-05-27T04:38:00.000-04:00

Amy wanted to go to a cupcake store she found on the Internet called Wondermilk. The "directions" on their website were deficient at best. They also have copyrighted the term Cuppacake for their products. We found GPS coordinates on someone's blog, but they were wrong. The true coordinates are: 3°8'138"N 101°37'261"E. Be forewarned that their Cuppacakes are not full-sized cupcakes, but maybe a third of the size. While they were delicious, they did not merit our circuitous driving route to get there. Maybe if we were buying a bunch for a party that Luke couldn't go to. (The egg allergy)

Another Golf AMTAM

2009-05-26T04:37:00.000-04:00

My last golf outing went as I should have expected. As in no golf. The Titiwangsa police course told us they were full until the afternoon. no one was on the first 2 holes. So we went to the KDE Country Club where a tournament was being held. So we had to settle for the driving range. What is so awesome about the driving range is that you hit balls marked "floater" into a lake from 2 different levels.

Now in the US, club employees will drive caged vehicles around to collect all the golf balls. Here, there are 2 modes for collecting balls. The first is the employee on foot with an umbrella for the strip of land in the middle.

The second is the the guy in a boat with a helmet and life jacket that paddles around collecting floaters. Every once in a while, he has to stop and empty the water out of he boat as his weight is causing it to take on water.

The cherry on top of the outing was when one of our party lost control of his club and dropped it over the edge into the water. (The "admiral" retrieved it.)

Toothless

2009-05-25T04:07:00.003-04:00

Luke lost his first tooth last Thursday night. Literally. He has no idea where it went.

The Fishing Store

2009-05-23T23:58:00.000-04:00

Here's a great idea. Put some small fish in a giant tub and charge people to "fish."

When Walking Sucks

2009-05-22T23:56:00.000-04:00

I love being able to walk everywhere. Except when it's like this.

Another Retail Logic Flow Chart I Would Love to See

2009-05-22T09:34:00.000-04:00

Just as I uncovered the connection between DVDs and socks, I have discovered a new product synergy that cannot be denied. Ready? People who eat leftovers have sensitive teeth and are concerned with oral hygiene. I know you may be doubting this assertion, but how else can you explain the following grocery store promotion: Buy plastic tupperware, get a free tube of Sensodyne toothpaste. This was in the fancy grocery store in Isetan at KLCC.

Creepy Bird

2009-05-20T23:45:00.000-04:00

Took the kids to the zoo the other day. These birds were all over the path. Really, it looks like a flasher.

Warning! Violator's Will Be Shot Execution-Style!

2009-05-20T09:23:00.002-04:00

At least that's what the picture says to me. It says, "I will shoot you in the back of the head while you are running away." The translation is "Do not enter. Violators will be prosecuted." It is on an empty gravel lot that someone has turned into a parking lot. No buildings or any property of the parking "company" of any kind. Maybe they know something we don't. Maybe that's why the underground parking garage at my apartment complex says they won't be responsible if I die in their parking garage. Maybe the guy from the sign travels between parking lots "prosecuting" people.

Smoke 'Em (Out) If You Got 'Em

2009-05-18T02:29:00.003-04:00

Here in Malaysia, I've had less of a problem with mosquitoes than I did in Beijing. Why? Because they fumigate the (^%# out of everything. Everyday there is a white death cloud emanating from somewhere and a couple of guys walking around in the middle of it. The other day they sprayed the makeshift shantytown the construction workers live in. Look at these and despair. People live in those. There were probably some people sleeping when this was done. Who cares about lung damage as long as you don't get Dengue?

Claire's Family Portrait

2009-05-18T00:45:00.004-04:00

Claire drew this lovely family portrait on the dry-erase board yesterday. Luke is in the top right. I'm underneath him with the Princess Leia-style buns. The one in the middle that looks like Mayor McCheese is Amy. Avery is to her left with the Elvis pompadour and Claire is to the far left. The hairy spider underneath Avery and Claire is Felix, our cat.

Why We Fight

2009-04-16T19:13:00.005-04:00

Luke and Claire are constantly battling. I though I would take some time to document some of the objects that used to be a source of contention.

The Duck Fork

The Monkey Spoon

The Pink Cup

Walk the Line

2009-04-13T20:27:00.003-04:00

Living in a right-hand drive country (steering wheel on the right, drive on the left), I was hoping to validate my theory of the unwritten "walk as you drive" cultural norm. So far, in the U.S. and China, it largely held true that people tended to also walk on the right when on the sidewalk or going up and down stairs. While the "walk as you drive" rule generally holds up on the ground floor of the KLCC mall, it does not hold up on the sidewalk and especially not the stairs. Here in KL, the norm is "whatever is most inconvenient for other oncoming pedestrians."

There is no real pattern. If you are walking down stairs and someone turns the corner and starts coming up the same stairs, they stop. They don't change sides. Sometimes they come up/down side by side with someone else and look disapprovingly if you don't wait at the landing for them to pass.

On second thought, maybe they do walk as they drive here...

Cool View

2009-02-04T09:02:00.003-05:00

One thing I will really miss about Malaysia is our awesome pool and the view of the Petronas Twin Towers. They will soon be blocked by construction, but the other night after a long thunderstorm, the fog created a really cool view from the complex's pool area.

The Claire Sleeps Tonight

2009-02-04T08:58:00.003-05:00

I should do a whole series of sleeping Claire photos. Here are a couple:

Zonked in front of TV

Asleep after reading the local paper

AMTAM Golf

2009-01-06T17:46:00.005-05:00

Truly there is no AMTAM like a golf AMTAM.

Experience number 1:
My friends "Mr. Jones" and "Mr. Smith" show up at a local golf course to play nine rounds. They pay their fees, get the cart and head to the first hole. There "Mr. Smith" is informed that his shirt does not meet the club's strict dress code. Too many buttons. Really. One is not allowed more than 3 buttons on one's shirt. He has to go to the shop and buy a polo from the club.

Experience number 2:
I join my aforementioned friends one Sunday for 9 holes. Now I don't normally play golf. I have some clubs, the garbage pail clubs - I found them next to a dumpster 10+ years ago, but I do not own any golf shoes. We feared this would upset the course's "gatekeeper" and sure enough, we were right. "No golf shoes, cannot," I was told. Of course we had already paid. So we asked the guy where to get our money back. He was surprised that my friends weren't going to just play without me. The wheels turned and he quickly realized that losing $100 USD in refunds was not as acceptable as letting me play in tennis shoes, so I was granted a one time exception. (They don't sell shoes in their shop) Just as we were about to leave for the first tee, the guy came out and said, "How about rental shoes? You can play if you use rental shoes." My first thought is "Curious. Why didn't they mention that before?"
I walk back to the guard shack and I look around for shoes and wait for him to ask my shoe size. The guy steps behind the counter, takes off his shoes and hands them to me. I have to use the "rental shoes" to play. Luckily, they're my size. 15 RM in this guys pocket.

Rental Shoes:

The golf game was also quite the experience. On hole featured a pond surrounded by some tall trees and...MONKEYS! Not just any monkeys, belly-flop-diving monkeys. As we prepared to te off the monkeys were climbing halfway up the trees and then jumping and bellyflopping into the pond, swimming to the side and repeating. It's a little distracting.

Another hole featured a 5-6 foot long monitor lizard. They like to lay in wait, daring unsuspecting golfers to retrieve their poorly hit balls.

Naturally, I can't wait to go back. Next time I take the camera to get the monkeys on film. (The camera phone pics came out all blurry)

Zoom Zoom Zoom!

2008-12-26T04:53:00.004-05:00

Merry Christmas! One of my presents was a sweet new lens for my digital SLR camera. For compare and contrast, I took a picture from the balcony of our apartment of one of the twin towers zoomed to the max with the original lens and with the new lens.

Happy Halloween!

2008-12-18T23:15:00.003-05:00

What? So it was a couple of months ago. I was busy. Doing what? I'm not going to dignify that question with a response.

Luke, the clone trooper, with his pal Wolverine.

AMTAM Math or Why Math is Important

2008-12-14T20:28:00.003-05:00

So we've had a couple of AMTAMs recently involving some pretty basic arithmetic (adding single digit numbers and use of decimal points).

AMTAM Math 1
---------------
The first was when Avery wanted to use a gift certificate one of his friends gave him this summer to the Stadium sporting goods store. It was purchased June 6 and had to be used within 6 months. So the last weekend in November, we went to KLCC and he planned to use it. First they told him he had to have an adult present to use it. Fair enough. After gathering all his stuff and handing it to the employee behind the counter, the madness begins. Clearly identified by his "trainee" badge, the clerk was giving the coupon the full once over, reading all the fine print skeptically. He moved his lips as he counted on his fingers and then asked his boss (who was inexplicably squatting on the floor behind the counter for some reason)a question. The boss clearly wanted no part in the higher computation and told the employee to follow the fine print. After counting on his fingers, the employee proudly proclaims, "Can!"

However, as he is ringing up the items, the clouds of doubt are clearly forming across his face. He pauses and hand counts again, this time with negative results. He consults another colleague, who proceeds to hand count unfavorably. In unison they proclaim "Cannot!" and the clerk informs me that it expired in November. I double check the date, which reads "6/6/2008." So they didn't even have to convert "June" into the number "6" to add the 6 months. I explain to them that 6 plus 6 = 12 and that 12 is December. I couldn't stop myself from asking them if they all failed math to the amusement of our fellow shoppers. Finally another customer asked them how they were counting. "June -1 , July -2 ...."

"Cannot," said the woman who went on to explain that July was 1 month later. She was still also counting on her hands though. But it's still just 6 + 6. It's not like they had to carry over to the next year or anything else particularly difficult. The whole "plus 6" concept was lost on them. These fingers were made for counting...

AMTAM Math 2
------------
Amy took Luke to see an allergist for some skin tests. While waiting in line, she calls me to inform me of the 3100+ RM bill ( about 1000 USD). What?! That can't be right. It wouldn't cost that much in the US and healthcare is way overpriced in the US. There's no way they charge more in Malaysia. When she gets to the counter, the clerks are fulling expecting to collect the large sum. Amy insists they double-check. Surprise! 310+ RM is the actual charge. I would not like to see what the insurance would have said to that claim.

The Christmas Portraits That Weren't

2008-12-07T23:22:00.003-05:00

Every year we take a bunch of photos of the kids and we use the least chaotic one as our Christmas card photo. I can't bring myself to delete the unused ones, but they aren't fit for print. So why not share them on the web? We wanted to take this year's in front of the Petronas Twin Towers, but the sun was too formidable an adversary. It either blinded our kids to the point of distraction or relegated them to the too dark shadows.

Christmas Sing - Luke-Style

2008-12-04T06:51:00.003-05:00

Luke's grade had a Christmas sing at school. Surprising for a predominantly muslim country. Although most of the kids at school are non-muslim international kids, they are expected to keep their home-brought lunches Halal. Santa, however, seems okay. Here are some pics:

Happy Deepavali

2008-11-14T18:43:00.003-05:00

In Luke's school's tradition of celebrating the holidays weeks after they occur, he went to school in his Deepavali outfit. Deepavali is an Indin holiday. In my tradition of posting about things weeks after they happen, I'm finally getting around to putting the photo up. Luke now only will pose with the cat.

Selamat Hari Raya!

2008-10-20T19:34:00.004-04:00

Luke's school celebrated Hari Raya (also called Eid - the end of Ramadan) last week. Only 2 weeks behind the real holiday. Naturally I waited another week to post about it. Anyhoo, at school they dressed in traditional Malay Hari Raya outfits. In order to get Luke to pose in his, he had to hold the cat.

Malay Construction Worker - MIA?

2008-10-20T08:45:00.002-04:00

What I want to know is - where's the guy that was wearing this "helmet?" Was it a one-time use hard hat? Really. It looks like it was made out of the same material as Luke's halloween clone trooper mask with the elastic strap.

Speed Racer (2008) - Can Eyeballs Vomit?

2008-10-18T10:39:00.005-04:00

Eyyuchhh! With nothing better to do, I rented the Speed Racer movie last night and watched it. I knew it was a bust at the box office. I knew it was widely panned. But I'm a big Matthew Fox fan and I thought, maybe it just disappointed people because it was supposed to be a family film and an homage to the cartoon. When the Spritle character, who always annoyed me in the cartoon, is flicking off the bad guys, the "family movie" argument starts to fall apart.

In addition to the Pokemon-like seizure-inducing visuals, the plot itself was just terrible. This was a real stinker.

I guess when the same masses (probably Joe the plumber and his wife) that raised "Beverly Hill Chihuahua" to the #1 grossing movie 2 weekends in a row fails to support a film, that should be a real warning sign. Speed Racer's warning sign should say:

DANGER- YOU ARE ABOUT LOSE 2 HOURS OF YOUR LIFE. AND YOUR RETINAS WILL PUKE.

Parrot Cat

2008-10-13T08:37:00.002-04:00

Seriously. Our new kitten thinks it's a parrot. As I walk by wherever he's perching, he likes to leap on my back and claw his way to my shoulder or one of the kids' shoulders. (It feels as good as it sounds) Then he just sits there. I chose this photo not just because of my goofy pose, but because the cat looks hyper-alert and the light in the background looks like some sort of magic cat crown.

CSI: Fairytown

2008-10-09T06:30:00.004-04:00

Not really. While this may look like a crime scene where the fairy victim was taken unawares, this is how Claire sometimes likes to spend her afternoons. Put on one of her fairy outfits (she has 2), and fall asleep on the couch in front of the TV.

You're a Pineapple!

2008-07-23T21:41:00.003-04:00

The family has all returned from our Stateside vacation a little sleepier and a little lighter in the wallet. Claire now has a favorite phrase which is her frequent response to almost anything. "You're a pineapple." Sometimes she simply says "Pineapple." Indeed.

CHIPs Toddler Style

2008-06-09T08:59:00.000-04:00

This really speaks for itself:

An AMTAM Adventure

2008-05-24T23:19:00.002-04:00

A coworker of mine recently taught me the acronym - AMTAM. Malaysia's tourism campaign slogan is "Malaysia, Truly Asia." AMTAM stands for A Malaysian Truly Asian Moment. It's meant to describe some of the frustrating moments that expats encounter when living here. For example, a new mall on Bukit Bintang, the Pavilion, has a newly painted crosswalk leading from its sidewalk across the street to a potted plant. Pedestrians have to walk around another 10 feet or so to get to the sidewalk on that side of the street.

Last weekend, Avery and I went to Gopeng for a white water rafting and abseiling (rock climbing, rappelling) weekend. The whole thing started as an AMTAM because the schedule only accounted for 2 of the 3 hours it takes to get there from KL. So naturally when we arrive (an hour later than expected) we can't go rafting as planned at that time. So why don't you start the abseiling they say?

So we are trekked up a slippery slope, across a waterfall, and then stop at the bottom of the path to the rappelling spot. At which point they say, stop here for "light refreshments," a cooler, hot water and instant coffee and chocolate milk. They do know it's 90 degrees here and we're in the middle of the jungle, right? AMTAM.

At that point, we had to wait an hour and a half before we could start. The joke became we're going somewhere else to wait. By the time we started, only half our group was still willing to wait around and do the activity. The worst part of the day was the truck ride back to the camp for lunch.

20 people are piled into the back of a truck like cattle. The road was only one lane and was bordered by a small natural wall and a trench with the remains of cement pipe supports spaced every 10 yards. So when our driver sees a motorcycle, who almost stopped to wait to get around, he naturally doesn't slow down at all and tries to move toward the trench. I mean what's 20 lives in the back of a truck compared to one motorcyclist? So we hit one of the cement supports and not one of us thought we weren't going to rollover. Miraculously, we didn't, but we did end up in the ditch. Then the driver wanted us to stay in the back while he tried to pull out. No go, mon frere. AMTAM

After that, everything was okay. The lunch was excellent and the rafting was fun. But an eventful day, nonetheless.

Luke "Swims Like an Otter"

2008-05-16T23:14:00.000-04:00

Somehow, the phrase "swim like an otter" has become synonymous with swimming without floaties. Luke has been doing this for some time now. He has also been jumping in the pool and swimming back to the side. In the last couple of weeks, he has started diving for toys on the bottom of the pool. He can't get them if they are too deep, but if they are on the steps in the middle of the pool, he can get them. While his swimming is not very elegant to look at, I'm no longer worried that he is going to drown.

Synchronous Coloring in Malaysia

2008-04-23T11:16:00.002-04:00

Last fall, Luke's preschool went to the KL zoo and the staff had lots of activities planned for them. One of the activities was coloring a drawing of a flamingo. When Luke returned from school that day, the teachers were very concerned about Luke's coloring. They thought that we would a) be upset that he had NOT colored the flamingo pink, but green or some other color and b) we would hold them accountable for this outrage. We could care less. He colored it and enjoyed it. Good enough for us. We chalked up their concern to cultural misinterpretation on their part, with them expecting Americans to get upset over this kind of thing.

Recently, as we've been buying Malaysian coloring books for the kids, we've realized that in Malaysia, there is a right way and a wrong way to color. So that there is no confusion over which crayon a child is to chose, the coloring books contain color and black & white facing pages of the same image. On the front and back page, a smaller color inset instructs younguns the correct color scheme to use. Good grief!

The Art of the Pose

2008-04-12T21:23:00.003-04:00

It's getting harder and harder to get the kids to pose for photos. The new methodology is that we take one "good" photo and one "silly" photo.

Good Photo

Silly Photo

The End of An Era: The Hubert Davis Tee

2008-04-07T06:06:00.006-04:00

First off, apologies for the long delay between posts. It is March Madness and the Heels WERE doing quite well. Not so much now.

For those of you who knew me post-graduation and saw me often in a casual environment, you remember my Hubert Davis Basketball Camp tee-shirts. I had several, some the exact same, as I worked at the camp for 2 years. As a recent grad, you just can't turn down free tees. In addition to being the most comfortable shirts I owned, they were a reminder of a great time. Hubert Davis started a 3-day Christian basketball camp in conjunction with the Chapel Hill YMCA while I happened to be doing a lot of work for their sports programs. It was a great opportunity to work with kids and to mingle with Tar Heel greats like Derrick Phelps, Dante Calabria, Warren Martin (who it turns out shopped at my local comics shop), Scott Cherry and others. Guest speakers included Eric Montross, Shammond Williams and other former Tar Heels. I thought the camp was a great experience both for me and all the kids who went there.

Usually, in a competitive sports setting, there's at least one person who is a bad sport. The guy who yells, can't stand losing, attributes intentionality to every foul. The 2 camps I worked didn't have any of these kids, despite going from 4th or 5th grade up through 16 year olds. All the kids worked well with the different age groups when asked. (Some of the coaches were a little snipey at the refs, but not the former Tar Heel players)

Hubert provided a great atmosphere for amicable competition and prayer without being overly preachy. I have nothing but respect for Hubert after the chance to work with him. One of the greatest experiences of my life was playing a pickup game after camp one day with an against some of the Tar Heel greats.

Until meeting him, I had always had a dislike of Dante Calabria. I think if you were another male attending UNC while he was there, it was inevitable because some coed you liked was bound to bring him up at one point or another. But after the camp, I've changed my mind. He was always willing to talk to me and my friends when we ran into him at He's Not Here. (He and Scott Cherry)

In short, all of these memories are tied into my assorted Hubert Davis tees. I had a couple that were the same, so it always seemed like I was wearing the same shirts. Over the years, I've had to thin them out as they gathered stains or holes and I need to lighten our load. The other day, I was wearing one when I realized that this was the last one. My daughter had wiped some jelly on it and I thought, after it's washed, I'm taking a photo for posterity. It never happened. After it was washed, my wife found a small hole in the back and threw it away. So all I have is this cropped photo.

The moral of the story, men, is that you must value each day with your favorite tee, because you never know when it will be your last.

Amy Tosses Salad For 2008 CNY

2008-02-06T20:32:00.000-05:00

The Chinese in Malaysia have a New Year's tradition where they collectively toss a raw fish salad for good fortune in the coming year. This is not done in Beijing. Anyway, here's Amy tossing salad and then our kids in their CNY clothes.

Yes, I know it's not right.

Claire's Breakfast of Champions

2008-02-05T21:35:00.000-05:00

Yeah, it's a poptart. Sue me. I just wanted to post a picture of my Claire Bear.

Dino-Diarama

2008-02-05T21:31:00.000-05:00

As mentioned here before and by Amy in her blog, Luke likes setting up dinosaur scenes. Although what he really loves is to line up all his animals on the march.

Detail:

Here an Apatosaurus has fallen prey to a bevy of carnivorous dinos:

No Shortage of Monkeys

2008-01-06T02:28:00.000-05:00

And I'm not just talking about the ones in our house. We seem to run into Monkeys everywhere. In Penang, some took offense that we were walking down the path in the spice garden. At the zoo, they were not just in their cages. At the Batu caves, one squealed at us on the steps. Claire, Avery and I went on a trip to see some fireflies and we stopped at another site to see some monkeys. At least these weren't angry, but they were everywhere and they wanted to check our pockets.

Uniquely WTF

2007-11-29T04:57:00.000-05:00

If you don't know what WTF means, you're a better person than I. But this ad on CNN's web site left me with no reaction except whiskey tango foxtrot. Who thought Giant robots shooting lasers is an attraction for tourists? Or maybe the draw is that children can play their gameboys in Singapore rather than at home. Either way...WTF?

What to Get the Tar Heel Who Wants Everything?

2007-11-08T20:45:00.000-05:00

One of these would be nice

There's also my Amazon wishlist.

And I know nobody likes to give giftcards, but I'm saving up for a digital SLR camera and BuyDig is the best place to get them. The camera I want is $150 cheaper than at Best Buy and Circuit City. I bought my last high end camera there so I know they're dependable.

Awas! Kids at Play

2007-10-04T19:48:00.000-04:00

Some pics of the tykes at the playground.

Zoo Negara (National Zoo)

2007-09-30T04:10:00.000-04:00

Ever wanted to go to a zoo where you can get really close with the animals? Now you can, unfortunately. Safety did not seem to be a primary concern when building this one. However, it was much nicer than Beijing's. All zoos seem like a letdown though, after going to Singapore's.

Here are some pics. Luke is really into Rhinos right now, so we took his and Claire's photos with them in the background.

Check out the black panther in this pick:

Selamat Datang!

2007-09-25T09:20:00.000-04:00

That means welcome in Malay. All the street signs in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia are in Malay. I've been able to figure out 3 phrases, counting the title of this post. The second is AWAS, which means "caution." Unfortunately it's not much use when you can't read the following signs that tell you what you should be wary of. The third is the most important: Tandas or toilet.

I've been told that some of my coworkers have wild monkeys in their yards. For a while, I though these would be the only wild monkeys we would see.

But then we were driving and saw one running across a phone line. Sorry, we didn't have the camera with us. But cheer up! We went to the zoo where these monkeys had free roam. Cages are for sucker zoos!

Yes, That's a juice box in his hands.

Chapel Hill Must List - Addendum

2007-06-24T11:20:00.000-04:00

Well, we ran out of time. We didn't get to eat everywhere we would have liked. Here are the best of the rest (in alphabetical order):

35 Chinese

Alfredo's Pizza

BW3

Carolina Brewery

Ham's (no picture)

Tandoor Indian Restaurant

Top of the Hill

* If Charlie's Chinese was still open, it would have made the list.

** If you are going to be in Chapel Hill for awhile, then it is mandatory you eat the supremely cheesy lasagna at the Rathskeller

*** With the exception of BW3 and Ham's, chains were excluded. (sorry, Red Hot & Blue)

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 6

2007-06-23T12:49:00.000-04:00

Dinner Saturday evening was squandered at a Durham street fair. Awful, but I do have to wonder what a "Monkey Nut" is...

Breakfast Sunday:
Weaver Street Market

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 5

2007-06-23T10:43:00.000-04:00

At home breakfast on Saturday.

Lunch:
Armadillo Grill

Kids PB&J taco and chips

Steak Fajitas

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 4

2007-06-22T10:31:00.000-04:00

Dinner Friday:
Pepper's Pizza - A Franklin St Institution (even if they have moved into the old Miami Subs - goodbye, 2 a.m SuperBurgers!)

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 3

2007-06-22T01:24:00.000-04:00

Lunch Friday:
The Loop

(This was an excellent chicken caesar salad)

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 2

2007-06-21T21:49:00.000-04:00

Breakfast Friday Morning - Elmo's Diner in Carrboro

Chapel Hill Must List - Part 1

2007-06-20T21:37:00.000-04:00

Well, the family endured a day long flight back to the States from Beijing and a week of jetlag in Charleston, SC. Time enough for us to return to Chapel Hill for a few days for a visit. But with a limited amount of meals in Chapel Hill, where will we eat? Here is our must list. Our first meal in town was Thusday night dinner. Our choice:
Allen & Son BBQ

New Book Titles That Should Be Written About China

2007-06-06T20:50:00.000-04:00

1. No Five Second Rule in China
If it falls on the floor, it's done. Don't even think about putting it in your mouth.

2. You Can't Get Rice in China
You can order it, you can ask for it to come out first, you can remind them during the meal, but you will never taste it's starchy goodness.

3. In an Atheist Country, it Doesn't Matter if the Customer is God.
Good Service? You're not in China.

Dead Men Wear Glasses

2007-06-05T21:31:00.000-04:00

Really. They often need to be refitted because their eyesight changes drastically after death. Don't believe me? If it wasn't true, why would they have a store?

Still Too Cute

2007-04-17T20:53:00.000-04:00

Mao The Tank Engine

2007-04-17T20:39:00.000-04:00

We recently visited the Beijing Train Museum. Luke is big fan of Thomas and trains in general. If you are ever in Beijing, save your 20 RMB ($2.50 USD). Don't go. We were the only visitors when we went to the warehouse full of trains. Unless you are a real train afficianado, they all look pretty much the same. They did have Mao's personal train engine and Zhou Enlai's personal sleeper car, though. As an added bonus, at the gift counter, they sold the same cheap toy trains they sell at the markets at a 300% markup.

Luke plays in a sleeper car

New Dinosaurs Discovered

2007-04-11T20:46:00.000-04:00

Luke has identified dinosaurs that were misnamed among his various dinosaur books.

Kissasaurus

Clubasaurus

NOT PICTURED: Brownasaurus - this crafty dinosaur changes its appearance from page to page, but can easily be identified by its skin pigmentation

Budding Paleontologist

2007-04-05T01:00:00.000-04:00

Luke knows the names of dinosaurs I had never heard of as a child. Here he arranges the troops for one of many Dinosaur Dioramas in our house.

Claire is too Cute

2007-04-05T00:58:00.000-04:00

'Nuff said.

The Beijing Zoo

2007-04-05T00:49:00.000-04:00

We recently went to the zoo. This was an experience. Many exhibits were empty, including my personal fave, the otter. But I got a good pic of blatant rule breaking. Here is a common sign in front of almost all the animal exhibits:

Simple, right? Don't jump over the guard rail and don't feed the animals.

Here a young girl has jumped the rail and feeding the animals directly under the sign that forbids it! Behind her, Gramps films her and her brother in the act. Believe me, I could have taken many photos that look just like this, only the kids are different.

But really, most of the time we were there, I felt like we were the animals on exhibit. Check out the bystanders behind me.

Chinese New Year: The Temple Fair

2007-02-17T23:31:00.000-05:00

A popular thing to do during Chinese New Year is to go to a temple fair. Here are some pics:

Luke enjoys TangHuLu, candied fruit on a stick

Kids with the Olympic mascots (the Friendlies or Wu Wa)

Cute Chinese kid celbrating the Year of the Pig

Claire's Alter-Ego or Teenage Blackmail Photo

2007-02-04T22:24:00.000-05:00

Wherever danger lurks, there is ... the Red Claw!

Christmas Explodes in Our Living Room

2007-02-04T22:21:00.000-05:00

Tons of toys!

Futility

2007-02-04T22:19:00.000-05:00

Whenever it snows here, the workers get out their brooms and sweep the snow. Yes, brooms. Sweeping.

Birthday Present

2007-02-04T22:17:00.000-05:00

So on my birthday I come home to discover that Luke has drawn 3 lines on his face with a marker. When asked why, he responded, "So I can be a Triceratops."

Street Obstacles

2007-02-04T22:07:00.000-05:00

This post is the first in a series of things that you have to avoid while driving in China.

These picures come from Shanghai, the most Westernized city in mainland China.

WORKERS ON LADDERS

Look closely and you will notice that the ladder is not tall enugh to reach. So do you get a longer ladder? No, you make some poor sap hold it off the ground for you.

WORKERS DRAGGING CARTS OF JUNK

Again, DOWNTOWN Shanghai. These workers stopped for the red light.

Xi'An

2007-02-04T21:42:00.000-05:00

The day after Thanksgiving, we travelled with some friends of ours to Xi'An to see the Terra Cotta warriors. I was surprised at how large and modernized the city of Xi'An actually is. And although they have no Starbucks, there are billboards announcing that one will be "Brewing Soon."

Under Sea Cables

2007-01-07T21:33:00.000-05:00

Please be patient. I have many updates to post retroactive style, but the Taiwan earthquake a week ago which ruptured undersea cables back to the States are still being fixed. As a result, my Internet access is SSSSSSSSLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW. And it times out out when I try to upload photos. Hang in there. Insert picture with kitty hanging from tree limb here.

Marine Ball 2006 - Grownup Prom

2006-11-14T20:01:00.000-05:00

Here is a pic of Amy and I at this year's prom:

Greatest Webcam EVER

2006-10-15T22:50:00.000-04:00

This one is wet and steamy!

Extreme Construction

2006-10-05T00:38:00.000-04:00

China likes to participate in its own version of X-Treme Sports: X-Treme Construction!! Where in the States, you might see one crane at a construction site, in Beijing, 4 is common and 6 to 8 is not unusual. You see, here in China, if a worker gets injured, they aren't going to sue anyone. Or if they do sue AND win, the amount that they win is laughable compared to what one would get in the States for pouring hot coffee on their lap at McDonalds. So if it wasn't for the cost of insurance, the US would use more cranes too. But the quality of the job would still be different.

The big risk activity though has to be welding without masks. Does the worker build up gradually to blindness, or is today the day that the molten slag flies back up in his eyes blinding him instantly? To be fair, I have noticed an increase in the number of masks being employed lately.

It's amazing how fast a structure can build up seemingly overnight. (They do work 24 hrs here) One day you're remarking on how they moved all the dirt from a vacant lot to the vacant lot across the street for no apparent reason. The next day the club house for a new luxury villa compound has been built. The following week, it's abandonded because there are already hundreds of unoccupied luxury villas in Beijing and the developer has gone bankrupt. Then the squatters move in. One of them had to have been the original developer.

Actually the first sign of impending construction here is a wall. As son as a vacant lot is surronded by a wall, construction may begin. You may not see what we are doing. It is exciting and mysterious. Luxury Villa. Luxury Apartments. Luxury Shopping. As soon as the wall is completed, Westerner speculation begins. I heard they were going to put a McDonalds out here. I heard it was going to be a Carrefour. I heard it was going to be China's first Target. -If China ever did get a Target, I think I would cry. I love Target. But I've seen what Walmart is here. It's not the same as a US Walmart. So I don't think I could stand to see what they would do to Target.- Anyhoo, walls mean change is a-comin'.

MeiYou Mayo

2006-09-21T20:52:00.000-04:00

2 weeks ago we discovered a shopping mall in Beijing that was almost a completely Western experience. When dinner time rolled around we decided to eat at the Sizzler. I ordered the Malibu chicken sandwich. It came without any sauce on it. Most of the waitstaff speaks pretty good English, but when I asked for mayonnaise, the answer I got was ting bu dong. (I don't understand)Not knowing the Chinese word for mayo, I did my best by asking for white sauce you put on the bread. Waitress number 1 brought me whipped butter. When I said this wasn't it and showed that I know the word for butter, she brought 2 more waitresses to listen to my white sauce on bread routine. Waitress number 2 returns with tartar sauce and 7 or so more members of the waitstaff to listen to me say this isn't it. While I'm calling someone to look up mayo, they finally get the manager whom we ask if they have mayo. He replies in perfect English, "yes, of course."

For those playing at home, the Chinese word is danhuangjiang. Literally, egg yolk sauce/paste.

The Night Wash

2006-09-15T01:24:00.000-04:00

Several days ago, I was called in to work in the middle of the night for an IT emergency. Because of repaving work being done on the expressway, I had to take the side roads to and from the office. As I was coming back at 3 AM, I was astounded by the sheer number of people standing on the side of the road offering car washes. Who wakes up in the middle of the night and says, "Oh snap! I forgot to get my car washed today and it can't wait until tomorrow!?" Apparently enough people to make it profitable.

"Sorry, honey, tonight I'm working the night shift at the car wash. Which one? See the tree fifty meters down the road? Next to the guy that's washing cars right there, but before the woman that's 3 meters further down the road. Go get my shiny rag so I can flag the cars down as they drive by."

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

2006-09-06T09:32:00.000-04:00

A friend sent me an email with a picture that reminded me of a web site I visited after reading about it in Entertainment Weekly. A web site devoted to Kitlers (Cats that look like Hitler)

China Beach

2006-09-04T01:37:00.000-04:00

Over Labor Day weekend, we took the opportunity to drive 3 hours to go the beach at Beidaihe. It didn't matter that I was coming down with a cold; we were going. An hour into the drive, Luke threw up in the car. I'm still convinced it was the half chocolate, half peanut-butter-paste oreo he ate. We stayed at a supposedly semi-swank hotel in a suite with 6 single beds. This place was filthy. Even on college road trips, we wouldn't have stayed in a dump like this. To add to the ambiance, they had 3 ostriches inside a large netted-off area. These "birds" looked like something out of the Dark Crystal. At least a third of the feathers had fallen out and they had these enormous tags jutting out of their necks. They made me rethink eating turkey at Thanksgiving.

Despite the lack of Western food and some people's reluctance to eat Chinese food, the worst aspect of the trip was that we never escaped Beijing's cloud of pollution. (I'm probably as sick of writing about it as you are of reading about it - but you don't have to breathe it)First the sky was blocked, now the ocean. You can't see the horizon. Only about 200 yards or so out to sea. Bu hao!

Another Great Evening Sky Means Blue Sky Today!

2006-08-21T01:31:00.000-04:00

Last night the sky was again red and cloudy with blue space breaking through. You could see the mountains in the distance. Spectacular!

Avery Begins Last Year as Pre-Teen

2006-08-18T01:25:00.000-04:00

Avery turns shier sui. Present opening ceremony pics:

The Day After The Rainbow (UPDATED)

2006-08-16T05:07:00.000-04:00

Two days ago it rained a lot again. At the end of the day, there was the largest rainbow I have ever seen over our housing compound. Unfortunately, by the time I walked to the end of the street to my house, it had faded. Sorry no photos of the rainbow. But I will post a photo of the red clouds in the evening soon.

Yesterday was a fantstic blue sky day. This place has such amazing natural beauty, it makes the polluted days that much more frustrating.

Breathe In, Breathe Out

2006-08-09T00:16:00.000-04:00

Photocapture of the moment when every citizen in Beijing simultaneously exhaled on their cigarette:

High Tide in Beijing (UPDATED)

2006-08-01T01:05:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, after many consecutive days of death smog, it rained. It rained a lot. Then it rained some more. My wife was stuck in a taxi for a couple of hours until the other taxis that were floating by touched ground again and it was safe to drive. Pictures forthcoming.

UPDATE

Luke Turns 3

2006-07-24T01:16:00.000-04:00

Thomas the Tank Engine's biggest fan turns three. Avery examines on of his presents as Luke contemplates his next present.

The Land of Blue Skies, Shopping, and the Morbidly Obese

2006-07-19T20:45:00.000-04:00

Did I say I would post weekly? I meant weakly. Anyway, I recently returned from a 2 week stay in the States. I'd almost forgotten how to breathe air. I was so depressed when I landed back in Beijing and the sky was white with smog. I've been back almost a week now and I still haven't seen the sky. Even looking straight up. Not a trace of blue anywhere.

Returning to the homeland, I took every opportunity I found to shop at Target. I had to buy a new suitcase to bring home all the loot. I ate at all the food chains that they don't have in Beijing: Chili's, Applebees, Wendys, Taco Bell and Burger King. (I don't particularly care for Taco Bell, but one of my coworkers loves it...so I ate there to rub it in) I saw movies in the theater. Woo-hooo!! How they are meant to be seen!

Misplaced In Paraphrase

2006-06-20T09:23:00.000-04:00

The most comic thing about pirated DVDs is the painstaking care the pirates go through to create packaging for bootleg DVDs*. Except for one thing. For the newest of new movies, the pirates like to put a movie critic quote on the box. Too bad they don't bother to figure out if the quote is negative or positive. Below are some move quotes. Guess which movie matches which quote. No googling please.

A. "Overly ambitious and too complicated"

B. "Drags the setup scenario out for too long and loses its comical edge in the process"

C. "This charmless comic fantasy is a major disappointment."

D. "Most comedians aim to 'kill' when they hit the stage. XXXX dies, and takes the whole film down with him."

E. "A fine, handsomely crafted adventure film, but not much more."

Movies: Wedding Crashers, Master and Commander, Syriana, Nanny McPhee, looking for Comedy in the Muslim World

* I do not condone the purchase of bootleg dvds, but find nothing wrong with browsing the stores.

Officer Clay is Like Savoir Faire

2006-06-15T22:38:00.000-04:00

That's correct; he's everywhere. Wherever road construction threatens slow-moving motorists without common sense, Officer Clay is eternally vigilant and sometimes with moving arms. Even the local press had to pay respect to the faberge cop: